Walking This Way 25 June 2008
As I learn the hard way to walk the small steps, here’s my Divine Covenant that maps where I want to go: 
I’ve got to “make it work” in time for my art exhibit on Saturday so am channeling Tim Gunn tonight. Send me good photographic vibes, please, & here’s to getting better all the time.
My Chopra Center 17 June 2008
Ponder This! 13 May 2008
As the mainstream media sows seeds of financial fear, I wanted to give you an alternate approach. Below are selected affirmations from “The Dynamic Laws of Prosperity” by Catherine Ponder, an expert in the field of abundance:
- “I give thanks that I am now rich, well and happy and that my financial affairs are in divine order. Every day in every way I am growing richer and richer.”
- “I am an irresistible magnet, with the power to attract unto myself everything that I divinely desire, according to the thoughts, feelings and mental pictures I constantly entertain and radiate. I am the center of my Universe! I have the power to create whatever I wish. I attract whatever I radiate. I attract whatever I mentally choose and accept, I begin choosing and mentally accepting the highest and best in life. I now choose and accept health, success and happiness. I now choose lavish abundance for myself and for all humankind. This is a rich, friendly Universe and I dare to accept its riches, its hospitality, and to enjoy them now.”
- “Divine intelligence is in charge of my life. I am now open, receptive, and obedient to its rich instruction and guidance.”
- “Nothing but good can come into my life, for God is in charge.”
- “I give thanks for the immediate, complete, divine fulfillment of these desires. This or something better comes forth with perfect timing, according to God’s rich good for me.”
- “Divine intelligence now works in me and my life and affairs, to will and to do whatever for my highest good, and divine intelligence cannot fail!”
- “I am now shown new ways of living and new methods of work. I am not confined to the ways and methods of the past. I experience my perfect work in the perfect way, which now renders me perfect satisfaction and perfect pay.”
- “There is nothing for me to fear. God’s Spirit of good is at work and divine results are coming forth.”
- “Divine intuition is now showing me the way. Divine intuition is now working in and through me, in and through all concerned, producing easily and quickly the perfect outcome, the perfect result.”
And my personal fave:
- “You walk in the charmed circle of God’s love, and you are divinely irresistible to your highest good now.”
May you find one that works for you and put it into practice. Fear not and go forward in faith, letting love lead the way. It knows the how, what, where, when and why way better than you do. And by letting go, life’s more amazing than you could ever imagine. Take it from me, the girl who once said, “I hate New York. Why would I ever want to go there?” I’ve never been happier nor more home in my life!
Inviting Intimacy 10 May 2008
I woke up this morning after a stressful dream. Jaw clinched and sinuses stuffy, I came to consciousness aware that I’d been screaming at Pixiema & Pixiesis, “I’m allowed to get upset, just like everybody else.” We rushed around inside a swanky restaurant, crafting a celebration dinner with the catering crew. Awarded a writing fellowship (yippee!), I’d forgotten all the details, the guests were due to arrive and my cell phone was out of juice. I hate it when that happens.
And then I was awake. BlackBerry at my side, I looked to see what I might have missed overnight and to get my early a.m. inspirations, courtesy of DailyOm and Tut.com. Here’s what my horoscope had to say:
Pisces: Inviting Intimacy
You may feel cautious and guarded today as you interact with others. An intense need to connect more meaningfully with either your loved ones or acquaintances could cause you to question how others will react to your overtures of love and friendship. You may feel insecure or afraid your sentiments will be rejected. This could cause you to be somewhat guarded as you interact with others. If what you truly desire is greater intimacy when connecting with others, however, you should allow others to see your vulnerable side. Allow yourself to let people see you as you really are. You may want to bare your soul a little bit throughout today until you feel comfortable enough to show yourself fully. Your confidence will grow, and your relationships will deepen.
Expressing vulnerability is one of the few ways we can break down the barriers that divide us from others so we can attain true intimacy. When you are willing to show others who you are, you demonstrate that you trust and honor your companions enough to be authentic with them. They, in turn, will see your vulnerability as a gift of faith that compels them to be as free with you as you have been with them. Taking such a leap shows others that you are strong and secure enough to admit that you are only human and that you need them. In taking down the walls that guard your soul and letting others peer in, you invite intimacy in. When you let your vulnerability show today, you will let others see the real you.
So here is my current truth: I feel like it’s easy to be Zen when it’s just me, my meditative moments and spending time in the safe cocoon of close friends. In the last two weeks, however, I’ve met a couple of men that I found myself attracted to and interested in exploring. It’d been a while since a new one sparked my fancy! In my initial interactions, I’d comfortably, confidently put my Pixie-self out there and had contact of the best bantering kind with both of them.
What happens after that, though, is far from pretty. In the next encounter, live or on-line, I begin to feel that old insecurity creeping in. I wonder “what I did” or “will I do wrong” or if just being me will be “too much for him.” Thanks to Eric and Terry, who worked through this with me last night. We brought out the Byron Katie and did much in the way of “turning it around.” Maybe I’m afraid I’m too much for me? Maybe I’m afraid he’s too much for me? And what would I be if none of that were true? A peaceful, confident, comfortable, open and enthusiastic Urban Pixie. The girl who I like and who was, in the moment of meeting said men, exactly the same girl. Silly circle but oh so enlightening, eh?
So that’s my Saturday experience so far. The real me, in all her incredible awakening experience, still gets upset sometimes and still feels insecure around the cute boy. I’m sure glad I’ve got friends who want to hear those parts, too. They encourage my honesty about it and I’d be nowhere if I weren’t authentic. I’m grateful God knows who I need when the walls come crumbling down. Come on in, intimacy, I am ready. And somewhere out there, is a man who’s thinking the same thing.
All Grows Up 30 April 2008
I spent much of last week with my parents. While they put in a little tourist-time, we walked miles in my Manhattan shoes. They met my dear friends, accompanied me to classes and enjoyed an amazing Unity extravaganza. Now, more than ever, I feel comfortable being my whole self in their presence; I have nothing to hide and even more to reveal. Open and honest, I cried sans shame when I hugged them good-bye. I’ve never been brave enough to do that before.
I’ve missed them since they left my apartment on Sunday afternoon. Reading Pixiepa’s email today, I smiled with pride:
“We got home around midnight…All is well here. Moth’ is getting ready for work whereas I have the day off to recuperate, buy groceries, etc. We took a minute over tea and hot water a few minutes ago to agree that many whom we saw have aged and a few have matured. You are at the top of the list of the matured names and we know that you have leaps yet to make that are beyond our imagination–but not beyond our capacity to rejoice, marvel, and thank God.”
Looks like it goes both ways, eh? Here they are in their Pixieparent cuteness:
As my friend, Victor, put it so perfectly yesterday, “(They’re) the only ones we’ll have. Ever.” I’m grateful I got such good ones!
Being Fearless Fun 19 April 2008
I promised to Pixie-post on Omega’s Being Fearless conference I attended last weekend. While it’s taken me a good six days to recover from this incredibly intense event, I’m ready to recap at long last. I want to impart the wisdom, teacher by amazing teacher, to you. So here’s a few of my favorite nuggets:
- Figure out what current cause breaks your heart, as it’s the door to an authentic life. Then, with that in mind, ask yourself, every day, “Am I doing everything I can?”
- See Stop-Loss, a true tribute to our current soldiers’ story & a clear call to action
- The mess of the world we’re in now is the “perfect storm;” if we leverage all the power we have to destroy it towards saving our Earth instead, it’ll be incredible
- Be love in action
- Go still & be within everyday
- Don’t let mediocre human challenges keep you from living your truth & doing your work
- Re-frame each “crisis” as a chance to say, “I can’t wait to see how this gets resolved!”
- When others hurt you, go ahead & feel the pain, go crazy but then get your ass to work
- Tell yourself the absolute truth about where you are & what you’re willing to do
- Say “YES” to where you are & work from there
- Your shadow side is a gift; use it or it’ll use you
- We are here for the evolution of our soul
- DENIAL = don’t even notice I am lying
- Embrace your “dark” qualities for what they have given you because they have served you in some respect
- Be everything your soul tells you to that your mind makes excuses not to be
- Practice reverence & humility
- Reason cannot take us any further
- Suffering stems from our betrayal of our own intuition
- Forgiveness is your first mystical act
- Everything you do counts
- Practice conscious kindness every day
- Do less every day
- Let yourself be big & juicy
- Be vulnerable
- Agree to start something you’re terrified of now & get it on the calendar
- It’s ok to not know what you’re doing
- Courage is being willing to see the truth
- Carry a pen
- Nap more
Sprinkle them, share them, but most of all use them to start re-shaping our world. If I learned one thing, tis this: none of us can afford to do nothing another day.
The Alchemist Awaits 15 April 2008
While I prepare to post a full account of the Being Fearless workshop I attended this past weekend, I wanted to share a little something with you first. I’ve been encountering all forms of the word “alchemy” for many months. On Sunday, inside the Omega bookstore, I stumbled upon Paulo Coelho’s novel entitled The Alchemist. I knew our time had come:
So far, I’m stuck on the Introduction. I can’t get past this part without a mini-meltdown of the cathartic kind:
“But if you believe yourself worthy of the things you fought so hard to get, then you become an instrument of God, you help the Soul of the World, and you understand why you are here.”
May you find your way to knowing as well.
Let’s Leap! 22 March 2008
In anticipation of Easter Sunday, I wanted to share the Unity “Words of the Week” with you. They are: ONE STEP
The beginning is half of every action. – Greek proverb
The one who removes a mountain always begins by carrying away small stones. – Chinese proverb
Why always “not yet”? Do flowers in spring say “not yet”? – Norman Douglas
As long as you can start, you are alright. The juice will come. – Ernest Hemingway
The symbolism of Easter is a powerful one in human history, and not just for Christians. The eternal rising up from challenges and problems, even death, resonates as unshakable truth in every human soul. All it takes for you to tap into the power of God within is to take one step, take one move toward your good, and God moves forward to guide you and direct you to your ultimate success of overcoming blocks to your good in life.
As the Prodigal Son “came to himself”, returned home and found a loving father waiting to give him every good thing he desired, God is likewise waiting for you to turn within and remember that all we have to do is step forward in faith. The power is in beginning.
Today I invite you to do what you’ve been putting off for far too long: write that letter, make that phone call, learn new audition material, update your resume, do that business plan, forgive that person you’ve been mad at for years. As Emerson once wrote: “We are very near to greatness: one step and we are safe; can we not take the leap?”
Happy Easter and Happy Leaping,
Paul James Tenaglia, Senior Minister, Unity Church of New York
If anyone’s interested in attending tomorrow, there are two services: 10 a.m. & noon.
Eggstatic! 21 March 2008
I’ve been angry at Easter. A reminder of my Good Friday breast cancer diagnosis, I’ve dreaded it since 2004. My sister hosted a hunt that Sunday. In a strange, suspended space, I helped her kids find all their eggs, and pretended my world was not broken. I didn’t know what else to do.
Excited about Easter this year, it took me a while to catch on. I couldn’t figure out why I had such Spring in my step. I mentioned its Early Bird arrival to Pixepa. Wasting no time, he combed the internet for an answer, as is his wise way:
“According to the BOOK OF COMMON PRAYER which lists the schedule for Easter covering the years 1786 through 2013, only once has/will Easter fall on a date earlier than this year: March 22, 1818. I only saw one or two other times that it fell/falls on March 23 as it does this Sunday. I think it was April 1, appropriately, 1956, that it snowed in Iowa on Easter when we all went to church in the pickup.”
Nowhere near April 9th, I’m feeling free to celebrate this Sunday. I love the reason and I love the season. I’m grateful each moment for my own resurrection and life. So much so that I think, maybe, just maybe, Easter and I are a-ok.
Here’s to daffodils, white shoes & God’s gift of a fresh start!
