A friend’s son struggles with socializing at school, especially on the playground. To address this & other challenges inherit in raising an extremely intelligent, “indigo” kid, she’s taking him to occupational therapy. The therapist asked M. to start an exercise aimed at reducing his playground problems in the last session. He refused, saying, “I don’t think we need to work on that anymore.” He told her that he no longer needed to worry about other kids not picking him to play. Surprised by the rapid resolution, the therapist asked M. what had changed in the last two weeks. “It snowed,” he answered. Without skipping a beat she responded, “Snow melts, M., so let’s get back to work.”
How often have we, like M., been overly eager to attach to the insta-fix? Sure, we can mire in misfortune & complain ad nauseum when “nothing’s going our way.” But, at the slightest sign of progress, we leap whole-hog into our new & improved reality. The important lesson in all of this is that life, like snow, comes & goes our way. Things will seem all white, fluffy & fun for a while but eventually, it all melts. & when it does, we may end up knee-deep in slush.
It is here that I turn back to the Buddhists. While I don’t find all my answers in their teachings, they’ve got this formula figured out: If we can be equally happy in snow or slush, we can learn to live at peace. Non-attachment to any outcome – good, bad, ugly, incredible, etc. – is the only way to ensure life’s blizzards don’t blow us over out there.
Here are two of my faves on the topic:
- Pema Chodron’s Comfortable With Uncertainty
- Jack Kornfield’s A Path with Heart
I don’t know about you, but I say, “Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow…”
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